明天过后该如何?

i seriously mean it..what happens after tomorrow? hahaha.i really dont have a clue as to the steps i can take after prelims..

i screwed up every single exam from the start of j1..why am i even in school? i dont get it..

you can't bring out the feelings the song is trying to convey
you look "sadder" nowadays
you dont have to study for prelims meh?

i dont knw why ppl think im looking sadder by the day..well..i dont knw.i feel stressed.honestly..i honestly never felt this kind of stress before..yeah.promos i faced stress..but i handled it.as in..compared to the stress now i think that was nothing la.because, at that time the stress prompted me to study..my dream was to pass promos and go to j2 with my class, my teammates and everyone else..thats why i just came up with a game plan.passed those h2s i could pass..and i just worked to make it happen..and it did.

look at the situation now..im really screwed..its THIS close to a lvls..40+ days..and im worried that i'll fail.i'll be honest..i'm worried..im not worried that i cant get into a uni or a course of my choice.as to that, i dont give a shit.SERIOUSLY..i dont give a shit whether i get into uni.its just that when i see everyone else piaing so hard to get good results for a lvls...i wonder why im not like them..why i cant have the competitive streak in me for studies..why i cant just set my sight further and look into the future..see that i'll be a roadsweeper 10 years down the road cos i couldnt pass my A lvls..why????

i really feel like shouting...i see everyone working.i dont know why.as in...of course i know why, but its too much for my simple brain to comphrehend..all that about going to uni, at least get a degree la, then next time at least go out find job is easier..all these, i've heard, ten thousand times at least.no exaggeration.but i cant comphrehend it..yes i know i'll be a loser if i dont get this a lvl cert.yes i know i'll be a nobody..but why cant i do that???

if theres any reason im even gonna study damn damn hard for a lvls, its just so that i retain my pride..thats all..honestly.i dont give a shit whether i get all As or a decent result for that matter..i dont give a shit..sounds like some immature idiot is trying to build a fantasy world for himself eh?

you think you can survive without an a lvl cert? no...you cant.you cannot go anywhere..you cannt do anything.your life is screwed without an a lvl cert.you'll have to work 10 times as hard to fight with someone who has a degree..

dreams bring about motivation which in turn inspire determination and results

i dont even have dreams nowadays.no more

i wish i was still a basketballer..

i want to run away.

Dedicated to the number 14