it isnt everyday that i have time to blog..zz

its not because i dont have time to blog due to studies, its just that i dont have the privacy to blog since my comp is now facing everyone else at home..zz

they're out to eat dinner..yeahh

i guess this september break has been very very very very fruitful.its not because i achieved alot by studying.no..not at all.i didnt achieve anything actually.i went to school on monday wednesday and friday..but i didnt manage to study anything on these 3 days..might as well do a recount..

monday
i went to school for consultation..started late ended late..reached school at 12.went home at around 6.fruitful only because i learnt some stuff about econs.not bad luh uh..

tuesday
i wanted to go to school to meet JnA to study, but i guess the lure of comfort at home was too strong..i didnt manage to step out of the house.ended up sleeping away the afternoon.woke up, remembered that i asked jian out to run, rushed to bathe and meet him.ran a long way.lol.the route was so cute.basically we ran from bishan to school and walked back to amk hub, where i took a bus home and jian ran home..again.day gone

wednesday
i did go to school to study..i was determined to finish studying some chemistry.hehehe.turns out, i didnt do anything except for realise the difference between aldehydes and ketones.yeahh..i went to swim in the afternoon before returning to school and going home with JnA.it was great to swim again.felt good.but my skin turned red.i was worried.why? because of thursday..

thursday
this was the best day of the whole week..okay.nope.since this is saturday, i should say that it is the best day of the week up till now...but honestly i doubt tmr will be better.hahah.anyway.thursday was our dear friend jihao's birthday...it rocked man.8 ppl got together and had fun tgt for most of the day.haahha.we were supposed to meet at vivo at 8.30...wth la.i really set my alarm clock so that i would reach in time leh, cos i really looked forward to it.hahah.ended up there at 8.30...only jason and tzin were there.after awhile ji came luh.hahah.and at 10+ the rest finally arrived.meaning mark hs ec sh...hahaha.we just went to sentosa and fooled around till around 3...i got really red i guess.i knew i wasnt sunburnt cos....i just knew it lah.hahah =) but i went red abit..went to carl's jnrs for lunch/dinner before heading home.

friday
went to school to meet alvin..fruitful morning lah..learnt abit of chem..i think he learnt more than me..lol.of course la...met zh for lunch at yishun...went to the library to read a book for 2 hrs..after that zh had to leave so...i had to do sth la..i decided to go and swim...again.yeah.swam for about an hour or so and left for home..anyway..this night.i had a super shitty dream.cos i watched too many shows on tv.zzz.i think there's something wrong with the grammar.i guess it doesnt matter that much...hahaha.the thing is.i dreamt about the worst of everything that could happen to me..i dreamt of the team again..dreamt of us training with a taiwanese coach (thanks go to the show "attitude", which records the lives of some taiwanese bball players), and that guy despised us....i hated that dream.i kept talking back to the coach when he scolded us..well..yeah.and that dream went on.omg.i cant believe it.anyway.the second part, abit private..hahaha.basically, it scared the shit out of me and i was super glad it was a dream..trust me, its not horror, not ppl dying, not me failing A lvls..its worse.

saturday
today was great.i spent the whole morning+afternoon doing nothing..went to the stadium at 6 to run luh..and do pullups...and do situps..aiya.just went to work out..getting so fat la.i mean..i dont wanna go back to the fat days again..when i was so fat and weak that i couldnt even do 1 pullup..omg..OMG..OMG now i think about not being able to do even 1 pullup and im really scared..so fat la..ahhhh..i hate being fat..ewww.all the fats...ewww.then you sweat alot when you're fat cos you feel hot....okay la.singapore's weather is hot, so fat or not you'll sweat..but if you're fat you sweat more.omg.i hate it man.im never gonna go back to being a super fatass again..what the shit.i couldnt even do 1 pullup..gosh..

anw.this week i've been thinking alot about life..about my family..sometimes you lose touch with your siblings so much that you dont knw what they've become, or what they want to become..i dont really mix with my brothers, go out with them, talk about school or things like that..all we do is laugh at each other..i guess im not cut out to be the good elder brother guy..i dont wanna complain about parents playing favourites..i dont think parents ever play favourites..seriously..if they dont allow you to go out, dont allow you to do this do that, its because you shouldnt be doing it..its because you havent earned the right to do it..you dont gain their trust, you dont deserve anything.

dont say that your parents treat your other siblings better you're always the one getting the scolding..i mean..its not like that.have you ever thought, its because your other siblings are able to exhibit traits which give your parents assurance that they are disciplined enough to handle freedom? think about it...dont complain about your parents..i think im talking a little about myself..my younger self..yeahh....maybe the reason is because you really should be less rebellious and listen to others more often..

im sick of thinking so much..after reading the philo book right.i feel so sick of life and depressed..its depressing when you think about it..

im always thinking of becoming a better person, to be a better friend, a better son..i want to be better to others.and of course, myself....so..im not going to waste my life anymore

i get bored easily unless i have a clear goal..seriously..i can even get bored of slacking..

im going to be a better person because i want to..because i want to change the way i live my life.

i dont want to be like a delinquent anymore, drinking, gambling on a regular basis..doing stuff teenagers aren't supposed to be doing.im going to change..im determined to be a better man.

i chanced upon lao niu's blog..it was super touching..esp the blog post about hc winning a div this year..yeahh team..we're still a team.we had 1 goal, and finally someone accomplished it..everyone work hard..go team go.go fight win.

think about it..maybe sometimes everyone ought to sit down and think about what they've been neglecting..

1 and a half days to study for prelims..better start early.....hoho..the irony of it.

goodbye

Dedicated to the number 14